My journey with psilocybin mushrooms began in 2018 when I first discovered the benefits of microdosing for my longstanding battle with depression. I researched and sought advice from friends and found that by taking small doses of mushrooms, I was able to alleviate some of my symptoms. However, it wasn’t until 2020 that I truly dove deep into the world of psilocybin with the help of my GP! These “deep dives” typically involve consuming more than 3 grams of psilocybin mushrooms and it is through these experiences that I have been able to uncover another level of living, better connect with the earth and its energy, as well as with myself, and ultimately become a better person.
Last year, I embarked on my fourth deep dive, consuming more than 6 grams of psilocybin mushrooms. The way I ingest the mushrooms is by grinding them into a powder and mixing them with warm vegetable broth, which I then drink all at once. I lay down in a comfortable position in bed, with an eye mask and headphones on, listening to a specially curated psilocybin playlist used at John Hopkins University. However, sometimes during the trip, the experience can become overwhelming, so I got up and moved to a different location for comfort. I always do this in a hotel to avoid associating my home with these trips.
As expected, the experience was life-changing, but this time it was on a whole other level. I had the opportunity to experience the afterlife, and it was truly life-changing. I saw my parents going to my condo to move me out and felt the guilt of leaving my dog Millie behind. I felt my dog sitter’s sadness as she had to deal with me leaving, and it made me sad to think about how my death would affect her. But I also saw and experienced something incredible: a network of everyone’s subconscious and I was able to tap into the information within. I felt something that I had never felt before, a sense of control over every outcome in my life. It was at this point that I had the choice to move on to the afterlife, but instead, I chose to stay. It was not an easy decision, as the feeling was incredibly amplified and magical, but I felt that I had more to learn and experience in this life.
During the trip, I felt a connection with people in my life and was able to communicate with them. It was as if they could experience my thoughts and their reactions were evidence of this. In what felt like the final moments of my life, my mind was powering everything, but I couldn’t physically do anything that I needed to do, such as getting up or throwing up to force the end the trip.
I refer to this collective subconscious as the “superconscious.” It knows everything about us, not just our actions and words, but also our thoughts and intentions. We are truly exposed in this state, and it can be uncomfortable, but it also feels incredibly freeing.
I had the opportunity to see what the afterlife looked like, and it was bright, warm, raw, and I could create whatever world I wanted to be in. This experience reinforced my belief that when we die, our subconscious goes somewhere, and our physical bodies remain behind.
One of the most significant takeaways from this experience was the realization that I did not have enough positive and deep connections with other people, and with the life and energy around me, and that my intentions were not always pure. It made me appreciate the value of life and the importance of cherishing the time we have with loved ones.
Overall, my experiences with psilocybin, both microdosing and deep diving, have been incredibly powerful tools for personal growth and self-discovery. They have helped me overcome my depression and have given me a deeper understanding of myself and the world around me. I will continue to explore the potential of psilocybin for healing and self-improvement and hope that my story can inspire others to safely do the same. However, it is important to note that psilocybin mushrooms and other psychedelics are illegal in many places and can be dangerous if taken without proper supervision and preparation. If you are considering using psychedelics, it is essential that you discuss it with a medical professional, such as your primary care physician or a doctor with experience in psychedelic-assisted therapy, before proceeding. The use of psychedelics carries inherent risks, and it is important to be informed about these risks and to take necessary precautions to ensure a safe and positive experience.
If you’re curious and have questions, find me on Twitter and send me a DM or send me a message here. If you’re seeking a more personalized approach to enhancing your quality of life, consider signing up for my Personalized Self-Actualization practice.
Please note that the experiences described in this post are my own and should not be taken as medical advice or encouragement to engage in similar activities. Psilocybin mushrooms and other psychedelics are illegal in many places and can be dangerous if taken without proper supervision and preparation. If you are considering using psychedelics, it is essential that you discuss it with a medical professional before proceeding. The use of psychedelics carries inherent risks, and it is important to be informed about these risks and to take necessary precautions to ensure a safe and positive experience.
Originally posted on January 17, 2023, on RyanNegri.com